No Regrets!

The jack-ass sitting in front of me decided to fire up Lord of the Rings on his phone’s tinny speakers. Of course, when the flight attendant came by and insisted that he put on headphones, he put them on, fell right asleep, and started obnoxiously snoring. Meanwhile, the woman to my left whose arm was encroaching on my personal space kept unabashedly wide-mouth burping through her mask without a single “excuse me” for 6 hours. Some people are just born to be annoying.

My research had suggested that sitting on the right side of the plane would offer the best views for the trip up. For most of the trip, it didn’t matter, as most of Canada was blanketed by clouds and I couldn’t see much. Every once in a while, through some of the clouds and haze, I could see some lakes partially frozen. As we continued northwest over the top edge of British Columbia, the lakes completely froze over and all vegetation was gone, replaced by scraped, rippled, dark brown wasteland. The rolling hills gradually grew steeper and pointier and whiter with snow. By the time we approached the Alaska border, the mountains ere getting really big. I peered out the window the whole time, loving all the scenery, but most others were not. Most had their shades down and many were sleeping. Leads me to believe that it’s mostly regulars and locals who do this route, not tourists.

Through breaks in the clouds, I could see glimpses of majestic mountains as we flew into Anchorage.

Glided over the gross, mushy tidal flats near the airport and landed under heavy cloud cover at 9:30pm, still with plenty of light in the sky.

It was cloudy, but the sun was still up. Due to some sort of staff shortage, we were forced to wait on the tarmac for about an hour until a gate became available.

When I got to my hotel at 11:30pm, there was still light in the sky. Walked around block looking for a bite to eat without any luck. Even the gas station with a big 24-hour sign across the street was closed. So I resigned to my hotel room, laid down on my lopsided mattress, and passed out.

Woke up early this morning to catch my scheduled tour to Matanuska Glacier. The internet says it’s 4 miles wide and the largest glacier in the US that can be reached by vehicle.

Our van headed eastward on the Glenn Highway, named after Edwin Glenn, a guy who oversaw US Army expeditions in Alaska in 1898. The drive was beautiful, offering us a glimpse of Denali in the distance and the rugged beauty of the Chugash Mountains. Our driver looked like Lori Petty and did not stopped talking or take a breath since leaving Anchorage. Most of what she has to say was not very interesting.

We got to the glacier, and at first glance, it didn’t compare to the immensity or natural beauty of Franz Josef or Perito Moreno, two other glaciers I had the pleasure of visiting. We started our hike through the gray, rocky, muddy moraine, a colorless and sterile scene which made it feel like we were on another planet.

When we reached the glacier ice, we stopped to slap on some crampons and continued upward. Our hiking guide dropped glacier facts as we walked, spewing a little bullshit about black ice, but overall it was a good presentation.

When instructed that it was safe to do so, I stopped to kneel down and slurp up a customary sip of glacier water. Most people in the group were not bold enough to take a slurp, preferring to open up their water bottles and fill them up that way. Come on people, live a little.

The scale of the glacier was a lot more impressive when we were on it and walking through it. It’s often hard to get a sense of scale and distance when all you see is ice. It’s only when you see another tour group in the distance that you get a sense of how massive the glacier really is.

After a few hours on the glacier, we headed back to the van and stopped at the nearby Long Rifle Lodge for a surprisingly scrumptious lunch of blueberry chipotle salmon tacos and a drink. As we ordered our food, our driver made it clear to is that she wouldn’t eat carbs because they make her fall asleep, and that she always gets a Coke so that the caffeine will prevent her from falling asleep for the ride home.

The highlight of the drive back to Anchorage was either Lori Petty falling asleep at the wheel and hitting the rumble strips (saying “it was the wind” after startling herself awake) or the girl sitting in front of me vomiting her lunch.

I went back to one of my favorite Anchorage restaurants, 49th State Brewing, for yak burger, a meal I really enjoyed on my last visit to Anchorage.

It’s Saturday night, so I was hoping for a lively social scene, but downtown Anchorage was mostly dead. Also very bright, with the sun still blazing at 9:30pm. On the way back to my hotel, I found a place called Williwaw and found a Hawaiian reggae band playing bouncy beach songs to a lively crowd. I sat down for a while to soak in the scene.

Walked back to my hotel at 10:30pm with the sun thinking about finally setting and the tops of the snow-capped mountains behind the buildings of Anchorage turning pink and a nearly perfect full moon rising behind them.

A very full and fun first day in Alaska. Tomorrow is a scenic train ride to Seward and a cruise through Kenai Fjords. I befriended a guy named Ali on the glacier hike today, and it turns out he’ll be doing the train ride along with me tomorrow.