So my friends Scott and Dave were talking about taking a trip to Hawaii this year to celebrate their impending 50th birthdays. Over the course of 2024, as drinks were shared and group chats grew from playful ribbing to X-rated irreverence and vicious character attacks, we bonded and found our group friendship growing and pulsating with love and affection. I waited for the most opportune time to ask… “Can I come to Hawaii?” (more…)
View out the left side of the place was unspectacular, no Waikiki or Diamond Head. Dave’s flight landed 10 minutes after ours, so Scott and I headed to the gate to meet him there with smiles and hugs. We couldn’t have timed this any better.
In the car to the airport, we contemplated booking massages at one of the local spots and talked about the concept of a “sad ending.” What would be the saddest song to get a massage to? Contenders were:
The playful banter is constant. I get ribbed for being Canadian, Scott gets it for not making weight for the helicopter ride, and Dave gets it for being scared of heights. More raunchy toilet humor than you can imagine. I quite enjoy Scott’s pattering little giggle and squinty eyes, though if you really get him going, he’ll go silent and point his gaping mouth upward.
As we prepared to take off, Scott set the over/under on actual airtime of our flight at 24 minutes, I took the over, but he won the bet with a time of 20:53. Everything is a game. As we landed in Kauai, we were treated to a gorgeous sunrise over the ocean. Clouds dappled the mountains in all directions.
Woke up and and walked over to our local Waikiki massage parlor to spoil ourselves first thing in the morning. Not much English was spoken, but after 1 1/2 hours, we were all feeling loose and limber. Scott paid up to get some additional rubs, meeting up with us at the hotel pool and joining us for some fancy cocktails a bit later.
After landing on the Big Island and picking up our sweet rental SUV at Hilo International Airport, we headed into town. Hilo feels a bit more jungly and less developed than the other islands. Lunch was at Pineapple’s Island Fresh Cuisine, another fantastic find on Tripadvisor. Nondescript place on the corner of a nondescript intersection, but the food was fresh and fantastic. The poke tower, coconut encrusted ahi tuna, and ginger lemon drop hit the spot perfectly.
After waking up on the North Shore and allowing Scott to motivate us to hit the resort gym for a workout, we hopped into the car to start exploring the beaches. Dave’s been dreaming of seeing these North Shore waves on these North Shore beaches for 20 years.
Another 8am workout. Kudos to Scott for motivating us. Gray skies and rain started the day, so we lingered over breakfast, sipping drinks, and relaxing at a table. Eventually, the skies cleared, and we made our way to the pool.
Floating in the hot tub, Scott and I watched the hypnotic, crashing waves of Turtle Bay. I already had something in mind when I asked Scott, “What’s one word you would use to describe the waves?” “Relentless,” he replied, without hesitation. Exactly the word I was thinking of. Dave didn’t come up with the same word, but two out of three ain’t bad.
Several drinks in, Scott began to morph into Dr. Scott, sharing unfiltered insights about me and Dave after spending the last few days with us. He rubbed his chin and labeled us both as pessimistic, negative, and traumatized. When I explained to Scott the distinctive flavor of Jewish humor that Dave and I share, based on self-deprecation and cynicism and annoyances, Scott said that things made a bit more sense, and he walked his comments back a bit. Now he understands why Dave and I are such schmucks all the time.
Turning things around, I have observed a different side to Scott on this trip. After a few drinks, Dark Scott slowly reveals himself, sharing opinions with passion, raising his voice and pointing his finger to do so, and even throwing the occasional barb. Belligerent-adjacent. It’s not quite Jekyll and Hyde, but it’s interesting to watch the gradual change. The distinctive giggle never goes away, though, so the Scott we know and love is still there.
Nick Allen has left the building. I miss Nick Allen.
After a quick walk around adjoining Turtle Bay Beach, we headed out to the highly rated Seven Brothers for a quick but delicious burger. Chickens hopped around us and jealously watched as we devoured our lunch.
Another morning workout, another chia pudding parfait and banana for breakfast with a backdrop of swinging palm trees and crashing waves. Life could be worse. Sitting at our breezy breakfast table with the boys, I told them my Claire Danes story, probably the best story I have about myself, one about building character, seizing opportunities, and living life with no regrets.
We spent most of the day sitting poolside, with gentle Hawaiian music strumming from speakers in the distance. Scott and I liberally applied the resort’s thick and cakey sunblock to our faces and bodies until Dave joked we looked ghost-like and ephemeral. We lack the thick, leathery hide commonly found on Floridians. For lunch, I devoured a delicious grilled shrimp caesar salad and then had fun with AI filters on some of our photos. It’s crazy what you can do with AI now.
As our trip draws to a close, yesterday was spent reminiscing about trip highlights and celebrating our friendship over drinks in the hot tub. It took a while for us to figure it out, but pouring our off-property alcohol into aluminum resort water bottles is sure a lot better than drinking $25 poolside cocktails all day long.
I spent some quality time catching up on my blogging in the cabana. Blogging this trip became an interactive experience, with Dave and Scott listening to the daily entries and filling in details I may have missed. Dave even started keeping a companion blog. My blog captures the larger experience and is made for public consumption, but Dave’s private blog captures some of the debauchery and his passions for giant waves and great food.
Some rain blew in over the course of the afternoon, but we were covered. Cabana for the win. The rain cleared just in time for sunset, but as we watched from the hot tub, everyone agreed that it was the most disappointing sunset of our trip. We chatted with a newlywed couple from Tennessee on their honeymoon. When the wife learned that I was keeping a blog, she urged me to get on TikTok, trying her hardest to convince me I could become a big TikTok star by making video clips of what I am doing in Hawaii. I was skeptical. Why would anyone give a shit about what I’m doing in Hawaii? No one even reads my blog.
For our farewell dinner, we donned our matching Duke Kahanamoku aloha shirts and headed back to Roy’s Beach House. A bottle of wine was consumed, laughs were laughed, souvenir coasters were stolen, and it was a delicious meal, as always. You can always count on Roy’s. We also started thinking about where our next trip might be, since it turns out we all really enjoy traveling together. Japan? Italy? Greece? Spain? Croatia? So many good options. The only requirement is that the next place we visit needs to be a little more social than Hawaii.
My name is Jeff. I'm a photographer and web developer living in Alexandria, Virginia, USA.
