No Regrets!

Woke up and and walked over to our local Waikiki massage parlor to spoil ourselves first thing in the morning. Not much English was spoken, but after 1 1/2 hours, we were all feeling loose and limber. Scott paid up to get some additional rubs, meeting up with us at the hotel pool and joining us for some fancy cocktails a bit later.

Time to explore Waikiki, so we packed our beach bags and went for a stroll along the beach. The place is packed with tourists, as expected, with a disproportionate number of Asians and Australians. Despite the veneer of tourists and restaurant chains and hotels, Waikiki really does have a natural beauty, with picturesque Diamond Head adding ruggedly beautiful character to the landscape. It really makes the place unique, much like the mountains on Rio de Janeiro’s beaches. Without Diamond Head, Waikiki would be nothing.

We stopped along a metal railing so that I could try to reproduce a photo of myself I took in exactly the same spot 24 years ago. I got it, but I also got photos at the spot with Scott and Dave, which is even better.

Scott needed a bathroom, so he left Dave and I standing on the beach and texted us, “I’ll be right back.” A few minutes later, while we stood in the sun with our feet sinking into the sand and waves splashing our ankles, he texted again, “Where are you guys?” Classic Scott. When he finally returned and commended us for being obedient enough to stay there and wait for him, Dave and I explained that when you say to your friends that you will be right back, it is understood that your friends will stay where they are and wait for your return. We took a few laps around the park explaining this to Scott, and he eventually conceded.

We parked ourselves at Cheeseburger in Paradise, where I had a burger that I didn’t need and chips that I didn’t need and a salad that I didn’t need and some of Scott’s french fries that I didn’t need. We chilled out for a while and had some laughs, reminiscing about highlights of our trip so far and enjoying the eclectic selection of servers at the restaurant.

Our sunset booze cruise awaited us, so we took an Uber to the marina. Traffic was again horrendous, taking over 30 minutes to travel just over 2 miles. This was no issue for Scott, who took the opportunity to conversate with our Brazilian surfer Uber driver while Dave and I sat in the back seat and debated ways to improve the traffic situation in Honolulu.

At the marina, we joined about 40 other people on a catamaran. After taking our seats, we were given explicit instructions not to poop in the toilet, and then we were off. The seas were mostly calm, but after the sails went up and we picked up some speed, the whale of a woman sitting on the front edge of the ship got absolutely drenched as the catamaran plowed into wave after wave. Dave affectionately called this women Shamette. She sat there, helpless and depressed and soaking wet, while her husband happily double-fisted drinks, laughed hysterically with new friends sitting nearby, and slipped below deck to snort cocaine. Dave made friends with a high school principal, Scott made quick friends with an Australian, and I kept myself busy hopping around and taking pictures. The views were gorgeous, especially when the sun touched the horizon and the lights of Waikiki started to twinkle behind us.

Then back to the hotel for dinner. It was Saturday night, and we were determined to give the Waikiki nightlife one more shot. The day’s festivities had wrecked Scott, so he headed up to the room and called it a night. Dave and I forged ahead, visiting RumFire and the Mai Tai Bar at Royal Hawaiian Hotel, two of the nicest bars in the area, but they were a bust. These beautifully lit, beachfront bars have so much potential, but they were only about 1/4 full with people who didn’t seem all that social. Our only interaction was with a couple of girls next to us at the bar, who visibly recoiled in horror when Dave asked them to pass the drink menu and dismissed us with a sneer when we saw them taking selfies and offered to take a photo for them. They sat there for about 30 minutes, turned into each other and taking selfies endlessly. They left, and soon after, Dave and I threw in the towel and did the same. On the way out, we found the girls again, standing in front of full-length mirrors in the hotel hallway taking more selfies. Kids.

We were concerned that Scott might have chewed on the couch or pissed on the carpet after leaving him alone in the hotel room, but he was fine. Unless, we are missing something obvious, Waikiki nightlife is a huge bust. Despite the thousands of tourists in the dozens of hotels and resorts along the beach, it seems that most of them just aren’t going out at night, and the ones who do are married couples or don’t speak English. So far, this is probably the biggest disappointment of our trip.

Today marks the beginning of our adventure to the Big Island. I used ChatGPT to expertly estimate the airtime of our flight to Hilo at 38:36, and Scott took the over on that. I won this one, with a time of 37:24! I am now 1-2 in the airtime game and 2-0 at rock, paper, scissors vs. Scott. It’s getting competitive! At the airport, we grabbed Scott’s hastily rented SUV and hit the road.

On the Big Island, we’ve booked a tour later this afternoon that will take us all the way to the top of Mauna Kea, a volcano and Hawaii’s largest mountain, for sunset and what is supposed to be some spectacular stargazing. We’re all very excited for it. I promised Scott some Pup-Peroni if he is a good boy today.

The visit to Mauna Kea has special significance for me. On my visit to Hawaii in 2000, I went to the Big Island in the hopes of visiting the observatories and telescopes at the top of Mauna Kea. Back then, there were no easy tours to book, but the motivated space nerd in me was determined to find a way. A 4-wheel drive vehicle is needed to get to the top, and I found a local who told me that he had one I could rent. He took my money, disappeared, and I never made it up. Today’s visit is a chance to scratch that itch and finally get up there, and the bonus is that I get to do it with great friends.

After the tour, we’ll be staying in Hilo for the night and exploring more of the Big Island tomorrow. Then we return to Oahu to finish out the rest of our trip on the island’s famous North Shore.